WHO'S YOUR DADDY? This is HILARIOUS!!!!

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WHO'S YOUR DADDY? This is HILARIOUS!!!!

The following are all replies that Detroit women have written on Child Support Agency Forms in the section for listing 'Father's Details,' or putting it another way... Who's your baby's Daddy? These are genuine excerpts from the forms. Be sure to check
out #11, it takes 1st prize and #3 is runner up.

1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, Makeeshia was fathered by Maclearndon McKinley I am unsure as to the identity of the father of Marlinda, but I believe that she was conceived on the same night.

2... I am unsure, as to the identity of the father of my child as I was being sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can provide you with a list of names of men that I think were at the party if this helps.

3. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was conceived at a party at 3600 East Grand Boulevard where I had sex with a man I met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good that I fainted. If you do manage to track down the
father, can you please send me his phone
number? Thanks...

4. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels. Perhaps you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if he's had it replaced.

5. I have never had sex with a man. I am still a Virginian. I am awaiting a letter from the Pope confirming that my son's conception was ejaculate and that he is the Saver risen again.

6. I cannot tell you the name of Alleshia's dad as he informs me that to do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications for the economy I am torn between doing right by you and right by the country..
Please advise.

7. I do not know who the father of my child was as they all look the same to me.

8. Tyrone Hairston is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him, can you axe him what he did with my AC/DC CDs? Child B who was also borned at the same time..... well, I don't have clue..

9. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at Disney World. Maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom .

10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember for sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the evening. If I had stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party at 8956 Miller Ave , mine might have
remained unfertilized.

11. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby, after all, like when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart.

Rebelitarian's picture
Rebelitarian
Joined:
Nov. 15, 2010 1:40 pm

Comments

If true, I find most of them to be sad, but number five is funny as heck.

I am a bit uncomfortable with the whole thing, though, to be honest with you. I'm thinking it feeds into racist and/or sexist stereotypes about "welfare queens," and it would be unseemly for us to engage in ridicule over it, to say nothing of how unseemly it would seem to ridicule poor, uneducated people. But I don't argue with your right to find it funny. I find it sad, but that's just me.

Zenzoe
Joined:
Jul. 31, 2007 3:01 pm

I think I recognize you, R.

You're the guy who doesn't believe certain folks are equal to you, but your family and close friends always want to be moved to the front of the queue when their organs become available for transplant.

Rodger97321's picture
Rodger97321
Joined:
Jul. 31, 2007 3:01 pm

How plain does it have to be?

In seeing that organ transplants work - an honest mind will accept that the body (untainted by misinformation) readily accepts and evidences equality.

Rodger97321's picture
Rodger97321
Joined:
Jul. 31, 2007 3:01 pm

Some of these sound fabricated, whether by the recipient of aid, I don't know. However, the idea that a cycle of ignorance and unwanted pregnancy and poverty should be allowed to churn along unchecked in certain areas of the country carries the spector of racism , at the least, or classism at most.

These testimonials to a public service are the scars greed leaves behind on society. Bigger scars form when we witness our government work feverishly to give tax breaks to the rich while children go to school hungry. Shame on this country for that.

D_NATURED's picture
D_NATURED
Joined:
Oct. 20, 2010 7:47 pm

A quick search on the internet discovers this very same list as having originated not only from the "Detroit" Child Support Agency Forms, but also from those of Dallas and Britain. I'm sure a more thorough search would find more places of origination. Hey, it's the worst sort of phony, made-up, sexist-racist crap that thoughtless people the world over find amusing.

Zenzoe
Joined:
Jul. 31, 2007 3:01 pm

I agree that the only really funny one is number 5, but that's the sweet, innocent, former "Virginian" and current monogamist in me talking. The rest are sad, racist or worse. Number 2 could easily be construed as rape by an unknown assailant.

Natural Lefty's picture
Natural Lefty
Joined:
Jul. 31, 2007 3:01 pm

I was a cereal monogamist once—I only liked fruit loops, all kinds. I've never been a Virginian, but I lived in Disappointment for awhile, since I couldn’t live in Rabbit Hash (Ky). Panic (PA) is an interesting place to live in—I fly there often.

Zenzoe
Joined:
Jul. 31, 2007 3:01 pm

Zenzoe wrote, "I am a bit uncomfortable with the whole thing, though, to be honest with you. I'm thinking it feeds into racist and/or sexist stereotypes about "welfare queens," and it would be unseemly for us to engage in ridicule over it, to say nothing of how unseemly it would seem to ridicule poor, uneducated people."

I completely agree. It has no humor to me, at all. It seems like condescension. Like, if you can look down on one group of people, somehow it makes you feel superior. Then you can make fun of them. An age old behavior.

dhavid
Joined:
Jul. 16, 2010 9:41 am

My father was born in New Mexico, so there was this gal from Kentucky on MySpace I told that and she said "so your father is a Mexican." I guess that would make Dhavid a Mexican too. No wonder I quit MySpace, She was typical of the mentality there. Actually, she was from London -- London, Kentucky. I have been to New Mexico but not to Truth or Consequences. I think I went through a town in Washington State whose name was the same as my last name except it was spelled wrong. It was a nice town with responsible citizens except it had a lot of jails. I have been to West Virginia (albeit briefly), so that counts as being a Virginian of sorts, correct? I am sort of a cereal monogamist since I prefer to eat Life Cereal especially before going to teach, but usually end up eating whatever is on sale that my wife buys. I haven't eaten Froot Loops since I was a kid. Just thinking about it is liable to give me diabetes.

Natural Lefty's picture
Natural Lefty
Joined:
Jul. 31, 2007 3:01 pm

Well well well, Dhavid’s back. To be honest, I’d begun to think maybe you fell into Mary’s Igloo, Alaska, on your way back to New Mexico.

And you haven’t changed a bit after all this time...still fighting the good fight.

I don’t eat fruit loops either. I have never had fruit loops. Wouldn’t touch them with a ten-foot spoon. You should have noticed I didn’t capitalize, as in Fruit Loops. I did that on purpose.

Dhavid, in case you didn’t notice— http://zenzoenow.blogspot.com/ Natural Lefty wants you to see Dick Cheney in the nude there...the Lord of Darkness, as he refers to him. Should be the Lord of Death and Darkness, and the Republicans are the Lords of Death and Darkness.

Zenzoe
Joined:
Jul. 31, 2007 3:01 pm

Personally, I found this thread really offensive and in poor taste.

But I guess we all have our own sense of what we find funny...

Plus, I have no idea what its doing under world affairs.

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meljomur
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Jul. 31, 2007 3:01 pm

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