It's so difficult to stop and say, "Thank you" as Thom once said quoting the mystic Meister Eckhart, “If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough.” It's not that I am thankless. I am thankful all the time and just feel that I don't have to express it--even to myself. I have an aversion to expressing deep personal feelings, especially spiritual feelings. Such outward expression seems so artificial even when I know they are genuine. At first, I feel so silly and embarrassed to express my thanks. Yet, I always get a lot out of it. And, therefore, I wonder if there is a mistake in my thinking. Not being able to stop and reflect is a symptom of lack of control over oneself. Lack of spiritual ritual is as bad as empty meaningless ritual. There has to be a point of contact between Thought and the World.
I only recently read The Prophet’s Way and learned more about Herr Muller. I have known persons similar to Herr Muller when I was a teenager so his story isn’t a total surprise to me. Both of my parents are American Indian. My mother was half Cherokee Indian and educated in a Cherokee Indian School for young girls during the 1930s. She was a mystic by nature, and believed in Prayer, Dreams, Angels, and Demons. And there is one point in the book Herr Muller said, “See G-d everywhere, keep a Sabbath, send light, eat vegetarian foods as much as possible, mediate and pray, build an alter both in the world and in your heart, commit random acts of mercy, and share your insights with others.”
And so to address this disorder of expression, I placed in a private area of my backyard a four foot statue of an angel with spread wings, with her head bowed while holding her hands cupped in front of her. Whenever it gets dark, I place in the angel’s hands small lights wrapped in clear carnival paper so that it glows and looks like a flame. My wife thinks I totally lost my mind.
Just the other night it was warm, and I walked out to the Angel holding the glowing bundle--her face illuminated with a meditative smile and the light made it appear she only had one wing. Maybe she is an injured angel, or an undeveloped angel, or both. And it was so relaxing and peaceful and beautiful with the darkness blocking out my surroundings to remove any context of place so that everything has a kind of personal presence standing there showing itself to you. And then easy thoughts came falling down about Wittgenstein, those dull-witted Robot Pigeons from Xenon, and those fascinating self referencing logical spheres that never stop spinning...and I realized that this little tiny warm spot that I once called my spiritual self spontaneously became a little warmer....and then a tiny little feeble spark bounced long, and then accidentally turned into a barely frail flame, and then that embarrassment of a flame got a little hotter and now the whole thing is all ablaze.
This mantra is believed to enhance wisdom and improve one's skills in debating, memory, writing, and other literary abilities.
Mañjusri is depicted as a male bodhisattva wielding a flaming sword in his right hand, representing the realization of transcendent wisdom which cuts down ignorance and duality. The scripture supported by the lotus held in his left hand is a Prajñaparamita sutra, representing his attainment of ultimate realization from the blossoming of wisdom. Mañjusri is often depicted as riding on a blue lion, or sitting on the skin of a lion. This represents the use of wisdom to tame the mind, which is compared to riding or subduing a ferocious lion.