What are Trump's pre-sunrise twits all about? Here's my idea - remember you got it first right here.

Trump can't sleep. He takes Ambien and suffers from parasomnia. He has no car keys (the chauffeur has them) so instead of driving while sleeping he fires up the computer and - still asleep - begins tweeting out his outrageous fantasies. On waking he can't remember them but won't deny them. That would mean admitting his addiction.

For some time his daughter Ivanka has been thinking about changing his computer code so he can no longer sleeptweet.

Now recently, while White Housing, Trumpster, with nothing else to do while awake, has been sitting most days beside a red button replica practicing earth blow-up. So someday soon Ivanka finally changes his computer password, Next day Trump begins his pre-dawn sleepwalk, becomes frustrated by inability to twit so, while still aslip, decides to push the real red button.

Here we are, Cormac McCarthy's "The Road" for real.

Nothing more, nada. Time to look up those baked baby recipies.

Comments

Alberto Ceras 2's picture
Alberto Ceras 2 6 days 18 hours ago
#1

I just got this from a reliable source. Pass it along if you want:

Fatherly Advice...

Recorded from a wiretap (Obama's?) in Ivanka's new W.H. office:

Atta boy, Bill. She let you do it! I told you! That was pretty good, but I’ll show you the fatherly way. Here’s how my daughter likes it. You know you have to get foreplay just right. It takes practice. We’ve been doing this pussy grabbing since she was a toddler. See there? She’s hot and - Oh Reilly - really ready. Now, my friend, you know how it’s done.

Well, OK, if you insist, we’ll let you call it The O’Reilly Factor, right sweetie? Sure, sure, you can, but me first, Bill. OK?

More to follow (maybe)..

zapdam's picture
zapdam 6 days 12 hours ago
#2

Alberto to think the survival of this planet is now in the hands of this deranged person. No wonder America and the world are having anxiety attacks.

Alberto Ceras 2's picture
Alberto Ceras 2 6 days 4 hours ago
#3
Quote zapdam:

Alberto to think the survival of this planet is now in the hands of this deranged person. No wonder America and the world are having anxiety attacks.

Yes, Zapdam, and Trump only tops the list of the world's crazies. The Philippines, North Korea, Turkey, Egypt, Israel - all headed up by crazed, murderous loonies. I've surely left some out but these days it's hard to keep track. They multiply like fleas. Read this:

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/02/01/world/asia/donald-trump-vladimir-putin-rodrigo-dutert-kim-jong-un.html?_r=0

Authoritarian Leaders Greet Trump as One of Their Own
By ROD NORDLAND FEB. 1, 2017

zapdam's picture
zapdam 6 days 3 hours ago
#4

Alberto quote "Yes, Zapdam, and Trump only tops the list of the world's crazies. The Philippines, North Korea, Turkey, Egypt, Israel - all headed up by crazed, murderous loonies. " AND ALL RIGHT WINGERS

Gaius's picture
Gaius 5 days 22 hours ago
#5
Quote Alberto Ceras 2:What are Trump's pre-sunrise twits all about?

He is in the bag. Anyone who doubts that Stewie is a drunk should review his speech explaining sending 59 Tomahawks to support DAESH. "... beautiful ... babies."

Roland

Alberto Ceras 2's picture
Alberto Ceras 2 5 days 18 hours ago
#6
Quote Gaius:
Quote Alberto Ceras 2:What are Trump's pre-sunrise twits all about?

He is in the bag. Anyone who doubts that Stewie is a drunk should review his speech explaining sending 59 Tomahawks to support DAESH. "... beautiful ... babies."

Roland

Yes, Roland, that would explain much of what otherwise seems inexplicable. In any case he's missing quite a few marbles as are the people who still support him, some of them women. How can any woman be a Trump fan? Maybe he pays them, lots. I don't believe the u.S. can survive four years of Trump. People must do something. Take a cue from Venezuela's people. Get active, take to the streets, do whatever it takes.

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