What are Trump's pre-sunrise twits all about? Here's my idea - remember you got it first right here.
Trump can't sleep. He takes Ambien and suffers from parasomnia. He has no car keys (the chauffeur has them) so instead of driving while sleeping he fires up the computer and - still asleep - begins tweeting out his outrageous fantasies. On waking he can't remember them but won't deny them. That would mean admitting his addiction.
For some time his daughter Ivanka has been thinking about changing his computer code so he can no longer sleeptweet.
Now recently, while White Housing, Trumpster, with nothing else to do while awake, has been sitting most days beside a red button replica practicing earth blow-up. So someday soon Ivanka finally changes his computer password, Next day Trump begins his pre-dawn sleepwalk, becomes frustrated by inability to twit so, while still aslip, decides to push the real red button.
Here we are, Cormac McCarthy's "The Road" for real.
Nothing more, nada. Time to look up those baked baby recipies.